I admit this spills over into real life. Funny, I cussed a LOT before I joined the church, and then pretty much stopped completely, and now that I’m a DAMU denizen I cuss again.

Here’s the thing…there was a difference in the content of my mind and heart when I didn’t swear. The swearing didn’t corrupt me…but I think it’s evidence of corruption.

Anyway, the way I was first taught about swearing was about not to use “my God” anytime I wanted to express my surprise or any other feeling because it is a sacred name that should be used with respect. Then I was taught about all those “bad” words and speaking a foreign language I eventually came to the realization of the thing you wrote in your post.

Swear words are intended to hurt the person you are refering to. I don’t find “son of a…” nearly as induslting as would be the question: “Are you upset and being unpleasant to me because the recolection of how sad you were as a little boy when your momy would pace the sidewalk and not tuck you to bed in order to bring home the money all her boyfriends gave her?” I have not used a single “swear” word here and yet…. Why? Because in the first example they are only words. In the second example I took the time to be creative because I meant it. I meant to hurt. This is to me what swear words are about: hurting the deepest as possible.
Therefore I don’t hear “swear words” I hear sounds that dono’t mean much to me unless there is a will behind it.
Yet I work in a high school and a student once told me something that made me feel like correcting myself about one specific swear word.
In French we use a swear word for prostitute as you would use the four letter word. And I confess that I over use it anytime I am frustrated by the smallest thing.
Once I could not open the office door and getting frustrated I said this word. The girl then said to me: “there are no prostitutes. Only working women”. Then I really felt bad. I am not the one who should judge who they are and what are the choices they made (if they even made that choice). Refering to them in a negative/angry context because in one way I want to hurt/insult what is being my obstacle is just aweful. Not because it is a swear word but because this women deserve respect and often they need love and not me belittling them by using their state/lifestyle to make me feel better.
So to me there are only words that people don’t want to hear and I can make an effort for them when I am around them and do my thing the way I want when I am not. But for this last word I talked about I want to make an effort just out of respect for these ladies and eventually out of respect for myself because to me this is totally a swear word.
I guess I don’t consider swear words what most people do but for this one.

Heh… reminds me of a John Gielgud story about not pausing while on stage… but I’ll not cause a scandal by repeating it.

Matt 13 - LOL. That reminds me of the Seinfeld epi when his girlfriend wants him to talk dirty, and he can’t come up with anything so he asks if those are the panties her mother laid out for her. So, if you are any good at dirty talking and the wife is ok with it, let er rip. I have heard others say that sometimes the f word is the only word that really fits.

Mostly I don’t like deity swearing or people swearing at other people in anger. But I have been known to fix someone with a stare, hands on hips and say, “I could roundhouse kick your head clean off your shoulders right now.”

There is a retort just begging to be made that would include other location possibilities, but I won’t go there.

I enjoy cursing at opportune times in foreign languages. Nobody gets their ire up about bloody, crap, wanker, bollocks, take a ride, baka yarou and kuso! — among others. And, hey, it’s a little eccentric and punk. Fun to zig when others zag. And primitively power releasing like a soul screaming “hiiiiyaahhhh” as one places a judo chop to an enemy’s throat.

Nothing creates forceful and impactful art like judicious and well-chosen expletives. Sometimes it is deeply satisfying to iconoclastically curse someone’s sacred cow by employing the pen as sword via well chosen vocabulary, satire, irony or allegory. Again, such serves the emotional release without getting folks too easily worked up. Plus, if it takes that much work to accomplish the goal of cursing, then you’re apt to offend just when it is really needed.

And hey, Matt (13): what happens in the bedroom stays in the bedroom.

What about, uh, so-called “dirty talk” during sex? Does that count? Yeah, cause John Dehlin wanted to know, but was too embarrassed to ask.

OTOH, sometimes when you hear something like “sugar honey ice tea” the intent is so unmistakable that the distinction is non-existent anyway and then you have to wonder if the careful substitutions simply come down to superstition of a sort.

He liked it so much he started (substitute) swearing more than ever.

Having grown up as the only mormon in my entire school division, being active in sports, and now working in an industry where swearing is both prevalent and accepted, I’ve also been very desensitized. I agree with SteveS (6.) that it really is just language of separation as long as it isn’t hurtfully targeting an individual. I find blasphemous cursing more offensive, becaue I actually believe the subjects of that blasphemy are real individuals with whom I have a relationship. I’d get upset if someone cursed using my wife as the subject matter too. BUT - I also have to recognize how standardized that use of language has become and try to recognize the intent of the curser. That tempers my reaction to it. That combined with the fact that I don’t cuss occasionally leads to a blasphemer apologizing to me after blurting. But it’s only VERY occasionally, if you get my meaning, and instances of apology decrease all the time.

One of my friends got me using one of my now favorite substitutes. If I stubb my toe or smack my thumb with a hammer, I can often be heard yelling out, “BAD WORD!”

I think it’s really easy to overdo swearing, just like it’s easy to overdo tattoos. But one little discreet, well-placed gem can make things more interesting. I think people, especially Mormons, give swear words more power than necessary just by being so sensitive about them.

“Frak” was effective at first because it was used in frequently on BSG. But now, the dialogue is peppered with it. I guess they’re just trying to “keep it real” being a pseudo-military drama. When I say it, it does raise my wife’s eyebrow, though.

So, are the roots of the words on Carlin’s list of 7 (now 10) words you can’t say on TV Germanic?

-Joseph Smith

“I won’t go to Hell for swearing because I repent too damn fast.”

-J. Golden Kimball

Something I’ve noticed: my sensitivity to swear words is much lower than my parents’ generation. I don’t wish to view a movie that makes frequent epithets to Deity or casual use of the f-bomb as a replacement for “um”, but twice yesterday I heard a swear word in media we brought into our home. My wife was showing me a movie trailer online and one of the characters used the word “-ss”. I wouldn’t have thought twice about it, but then I realized that my two daughters, age 5, were standing around the computer watching the trailer with us. They certainly didn’t pick up on the “bad” word, and luckily they didn’t start using it, but that sort of thing would have never happened when I was a kid. Later, after the kids were in bed, my wife and I were watching Kevin Costner’s Open Range on AMC. When Robert Duvall’s character goes in to kill the bad guy at the end, he says something like “Take that you son of a –tch!” My wife and I both laughed. The language was cathartic, even if it was crude. Perhaps it wouldn’t have been as effective if Duvall had said “Take that you whippersnapper, you!” or even “Take that, you cur!” I’ve come to understand that judicious (not casual or unconscious) use of “bad” language in art has its place. Take that all you Orson Scott Card haters!

In any case, ever since I learned about a stroke-induced aphasia which leaves social cueing/responses intact and includes massive-scale swearing production in non-swearers, my view of how “natural” swearing is has changed. It seems to me that there are neurological structures which serve the social function of language, rather than information transfer. Swearing in one mode or another is a natural neurological product of certain social conditions, and serves a function in social contexts.

That being said, it may be part of the “natural man” we are told we need to put off.

I posted on this topic a while ago on a different blog. Rather than excerpt sections, I might rework it into a separate post in a bit.