The main reasons we have the computer in a public place is a concern for pornography. When I was a young man, we could find pornography in seedy little stores. It would require a deliberate trip to places that were somewhat scary and certainly out of the way. These stores are now out of business because we can all easily access pornography in the privacy of our own homes. The difference between being on a church site and a porno site is just a click of a mouse.

I think for teenage boys, putting a computer in their room with internet access and expecting them to not look at some at porno sites would be as unreasonable as placing a stack of girly magazines in their rooms and telling them not to look at them. I doubt I could resist such temptation and I am a aging high priest and an early morning seminary teacher.

I know that my teenagers can and some have viewed R rated movies and naughty internet sites at friend’s houses. I cannot and would not constantly monitor their activities to enforce our standards. I am not my children’s policeman or jailor. We all have lapses and difficult decisions to make. At some point my children have to chose the standards that they will follow. Nevertheless, I can them minimized the temptations that they must face, at least in my home.

As for passwords and monitoring email and instant messaging, I depend on my children to teach me how to use these sites. But again, I am not my children’s jailor nor in an adversarial relationship with them. We are fellow travelers seeking to keep the commandments and to stay close to the Lord. They help me and I help them.

We just let our son get an account on My Space, but he had to give us the password so we could access it any time we want to. He doesn’t seem to mind yet, but he is still a young teenager.

We seem to be pretty permissive too as far as what the kids can watch. Spongebob doesn’t bother me as much as it does some parents, but my children have never really picked up any bad behavior from the shows they watch. The cartoon network was banned because they have some really bad cartoons, but like hawkgrrrl said, if I give them a little bit of room they don’t seem to feel the need to rebel as much.

I often wonder when we hear council from our leaders, if they have really thought through the implications of what they are asking. The guilt they create. It has felt so good to finally be able to say “Yeah, yeah yeh”

GT

We have one television that gets channels, and one for DDR, which is seems everyone outgrew. The computers are in public places, keeps us from getting as isolated.

Well said.

Although the TV is in an open area, we’ve even had issues with the kids sneaking peeks at banned shows or channels. For example, my wife won’t let the kids watch Fairly Odd Parents anymore because the characters constantly insult each other and use rude words we are trying delay the inevitable adoption of. Yet, even our 4-year-old has been caught watching it with the sound turned down and then whispering to his sister not to turn it up or else they’ll get caught. Its so hilarious how kids think their parents don’t know what’s going on. (I just got an idea for a fun post. Sticky note time.)

My son is only 1 1/2, but I’m never going to put a TV in his room. Plus my wife barely likes TV in the living room, so there you go. As for the internet, just putting it in a public place doesn’t necessarily solve everything, because there will always be times at a friend’s house and etc.

So, my son actually gets MORE exercise because of a portable DVD player in his room. That’s probably outside the norm.

When I was growing up, our family had one stereo in the living room. We all shared each other’s music, and as a consequence the kids ended up liking Bach, Stravinsky, Khachaturian, etc. and the parents gradually came to enjoy the kids’ music as well. It was tough to endure some of the horrible stuff my little brother played, I remember, but almost always I would end up getting what he saw in it, what was so good about it, and liking it too. It’s a huge benefit to everyone that they get such an opportunity to broaden their tastes. I think it was a great thing having only one stereo.

Of course today we all have mp3 players. They’re so convenient and enriching, allowing us to listen to podcasts, books on tape, and great music in times and places where we wouldn’t have had anything at all otherwise. If you have to be in the doctor’s office for two hours, it makes a great improvement to be able to enjoy listening to something awesome instead of slowly losing patience and fuming the whole time. I can’t possibly see giving up our mp3 players. But they’re inherently private. That’s a real disadvantage.

I suppose it’s better for computers to be public as well, and for us to share a computer. Computers seem as personal as toothbrushes or underwear to me, though. It’s been weird sharing with my son since I adopted him. I keep thinking I should get him his own. Maybe you’re right that I shouldn’t, though. Our computer is in a public area, but we use it at times when the other is asleep, helping to generate more privacy. I do trust my son, and I don’t think it’s gentlemanly to spy on what he says or does online. But I remember how nice the family stereo was when I was young, and how much good it did for all of us. Maybe computers are the same way?